should I stay of should I go!

A Timely Article from Rabbi Mark Rantz

In 1982, Mick Jones of The Clash wrote, “Should I Stay of Should I Go” where the chorus reads, 
 
“Should I stay, or should I go now? Should I stay, or should I go now? If I go, there will be trouble. And if I stay, it will be double. So come on and let me know.”
 
Not an immediate hit, this song reached its height of popularity in 1991, not in America, but in the UK, and is now marked as an iconic song for the period. According to Jones, this song was not a love song, but instead “... a more general mediation on human indecision” emerging from a time of fatigue in the band manifest by a constant touring and vigorous recording schedule. In reading this, some might question “Why I would reference such a lyric for a Messianic article, and wondering if there is a method to my madness?” In truth three is! This song in many ways mirrors what Jones identifies as indecision, and what we see for many within culture concerning an inability to trust, commit, and build life-long relationships. Although The Clash never offers a solution for our human dilemma, (especially here in the West) the reality remains that in our flesh, we are more bent on selfishness, narcissism and self-sabotage than willful vulnerability, a life-long commitment to the other, and a collective identity with something. bigger than ourselves. 
 
For us as believers in Yeshua, this challenge is most seen in how many envision, and live out their lives within the local church or Messianic congregation. Although we would all hope that it was different, many believers are not properly discipled, and many congregational leaders have  failed to instruct their people on the importance of covenant relationships and mutual accountability. For leaders within Tikkun, such seems to be engrained within our spiritual DNA, but do our people fully grasp its central, overarching importance? We must never forget God’s mandate for us to live in community and fulfill the calling placed on us in Messiah Yeshua. 
 
This is best seen in Yeshua calling in John chapter 17 for us to live in unity where He exhorts,
 
“I pray not on behalf of these only, but also for those who believe in Me through their message, that they all may be one. Just as You, Father, are in Me and I am in You, so also may they be one in Us, so the world may believe that You sent Me.” (vs. 20-21 TLV emphasis mine)
 
From this you may ask, how is it that this passage addresses our problem above where so many are bent on selfishness, narcissism and self-sabotage? What can Yeshua’s admonition to us teach us concerning covenant relationships, and the congregational life? To both understand and apply this this important point we must first recognize that the model of unity to which we are called should reflect that same unity that we see between Yeshua Himself and our Heavenly Father. Although we are not as the Lord is, still we must never forget that in the Godhead there is no division, contradiction,  and never a destructive spirit of disunity. Instead, Avinu our Father, Yeshua the Son, and the Ruach haKodesh is forever consistent as divine covenantal love! So this is our calling to one another, and although we are perfect as Adonai is, still we are called to imitate our Messiah and His high calling on our lives. For this reason we are told, “...  be imitators of God, as dearly loved children; and walk in love, just as Messiah also loved us and gave Himself up for us as an offering and sacrifice to God for a fragrant aroma.” (Eph. 5:1-2)
 
From this, have you ever considered that following Yeshua is not only defined by your faithfulness to “... walk in love” toward one another, and that such faithfulness is compared to the Lord’s own example who “... as an offering and sacrifice to God for a fragrant aroma.” In the same way, our call to biblical unity and accountability is received by God as worship, and as a fragrant aroma before the throne room of God. Where once, selfishness, narcissism and self-sabotage could be overlooked, now our calling to community and as a family surpasses them all. For this reason, verses 22-23 Yeshua reminds of our true calling as one community by stating how,
“The glory that You have given to Me I have given to them, that they may be one just as We are one— I in them and You in Me--that they may be perfected in unity, so that the world may know that You sent Me and loved them as You loved Me.” (emphasis mine)
Love and life-long covenant relationships is therefore, both the hallmark of our Messiah faith, and the context from which love is expressed from God, and reflective in the body life of a local congregation, as governed under the pastoral care of a local body of Elders. For myself, this sense of unity was most powerfully demonstrated years ago when I served as Rabbi at Rosh Pina Messianic Congregation in Owings Mills, MD. During our time there, my wife and I lived in Pikesville, a vibrant Orthodox Jewish community. From my observance of watching the traditional Jewish community live out their emunah (faith), I saw how clearly we are followers of Yeshua must all the more live. For my Orthodox neighbors the question of on a whim leaving unheard of. There would never be an answer to the hypothetical’s of “do you like your congregation or rabbi, or would you ever see yourself elsewhere” would never come into play, nor would there be temptation of “congregational hopping” on a whim come into play, but the life of faithfulness is alone expressed in a life of authentic, lasting community. Where Mick Jones identified in his 1982 song concerning our duplicity, we are reminded anew that the only reason to go to a congregation is because God is leading us there. However, such a choice is never merely a “decision” of the individual, but instead should be seen in the context of blessing, where the person is received into a community, and in reverse, the only reason to ever leave is both a result of the leading of the Spirit, and also the blessing of the local body of Elders where the person leaving is loved, blessed and sent out in blessing. Now if the congregation is either toxic and destructive, or if there is open, unrepentant sin among the leadership, then, there can be exceptions, but all others must be acted on alone in the context of covenant. Yet isn’t it true that is almost never done. Sadly, in most cases a person out of nowhere will at best say, “... God is leading me elsewhere and my season here is over,” or at worse, just disappear and severe relationships and thus damage many! Also, many approach the community as a ‘dream’ or misconception, where they cherry-pick what they like, but reject through attrition the commands our flesh likes the least. When such a false narrative wins, there is never a possibility for a Matthew 19 process, nor relationships healed because the individual has abandoned community. As long as this exists, how can we ever claim that we are fulfilling Messiah’s mandate in John 17 to be echad (one) even as Yeshua, and the Father are one? Instead, may we model our lives in community and covenantal responsibility, for as Deitrich Bonhoeffer states in Life Together,
 
“The person who loves their dream of community will destroy community, but the person who loves those around them will create community.”